Which then leaves me with telling you something old.
On Sunday, April 14th, I celebrated being a mother for my twenty-sixth year. Where does the time go!
Often I look back on the whole business of “yes, let’s have kids” and wonder what was I smoking - or, not smoking might be more like it - when I nodded in agreement. (as this was “his” idea)
If I had the ability to look ahead and see what was in store I would have realized the importance of marrying rich… or taken up with a band of really successful bank robbers.
Kids cost - and that is nothing new.
The basic cost of raising a child can kill any dream you might have had about owning more than the shirt on your back - really, forget about that Harley, the collector edition Corvette Stingray that caught your eye, the cottage in Cariboo country… which were all within reach when both of you worked and had only to pay for yourselves.
Enter the cute, wee, helpless bloodsucker - aka the fruit of your loins - and from then on in it’s a steady stream of intravenous cash sucking tubes attached to your wallet.
Let’s take feet - my sweet precious has these amazingly slender feet (4A width), size 10.5 - beautiful longs toes and a high instep - great if you want to be a shoe model.
Try and find shoes for these gorgeous feet - okay, it can be done, but at a price. Since foot care was a specialty of mine there was no compromising when it came to buying proper footwear.
Runners alone needed to be purchased every three months at the sum of $189.00 - that’s right. Try and find a runner that’s a 4A width and deals with feet that pronate. The running shop I dealt with wasn't interested in the liver I was selling - I did, however, get a discount when I bought two pair.
Let’s move up to the teeth - yes, it’s the single mother that gets the child which needs orthodontia - but not just a regular set of braces.
Oh no, my sweet precious needed all four wisdom teeth removed. An eye tooth wouldn’t descend - it was stuck up there behind her nose - so there was surgery involved and extra hooks and chains needed to be attached to the braces to pull that rogue tooth from it’s hiding spot.
Then, god forbid I wasn't going to see sweet precious fulfill her dreams of working for Disney so off to film/animation summer camp she went year after year.
Let’s not forget the backup plan, just in case she still wanted to be a vet, which every little girl that has a horse fetish dreams of becoming, I hired the best math and science tutor for those last three years of high school.
So… as you can see I was a walking intravenous cash drip (aka the walking dead); my wants were on the back burner of that stove, in that cabin in the country, you know, the one in the Cariboo that I've been dreaming of since before sweet precious was even a thought.
- - - - - -
I’m happy to say - the pressure’s been off for a while... well, sort of... as a parent I’ll never really stop “being there” - but on February 14th I treated myself to a Valentine’s Day gift - and bought myself a shiny new car - ja, Das Auto!
Colour: Shark Blue - Nickname: Sharkie 2.5L VW Golf - Das Auto, with Das Attitude! |
And… my house, which has been neglected, is getting a serious facelift this May (better it than me) and… just for the fun of it I’m going to check out that Harley I’ve been wanting since I was twenty-nine.
There’s a cottage in the Cariboo that I’ve got my eye on too… but that may still be a distant dream; one I continue to entertain now and then. (I did go in and get those dreams of mine off the back burner though)
The Cabin in the Cariboo |
View from the Cabin in the Cariboo |
Dreams cost… and that is nothing new - only now, I think I can afford a few of them.
Have you put your dreams on hold to raise your family?
Cheers, Jenny
Such a lovely cottage!
ReplyDeleteThanks Claudia. :)
DeleteWhat great dreams and some of them are coming true!
ReplyDeleteIt's important to have dreams, even more important to see a few come true - I'm lucky because more than one has made it into my reality.
DeleteThanks for stopping by, Sally. :) :)
My son had that same eyetooth problem--his orthodontia was complex, costly, and went on forever. He does have a very nice smile now, though. (Sure, easy for HIM to smile--he wasn't paying for it. *grin*)
ReplyDeleteYou make me laugh, Linda, with your comment - easy for my daughter to smile too - but she does say "thanks" now and then. :) :)
Deletei hear ya--my dreams are on hold until i win the lottery--here's to all of our dreams coming true, jenny :)
ReplyDeleteHopefully, Lynn, you don't wait for the lottery - make them come true just by believing they will.
DeleteThanks for stopping by. :) :)
Sometimes the dreams can be nightmares; and at other times we wish they could go on forever - strange how they both result from the single act of sleeping - the parallels to the waking moments of our lives are astonishing. May your dreams become your reality.
ReplyDeleteVery true, Jeff, dreams and nightmares are often two sides of the same coin, and as you say are often the parallels of our waking moments. I embrace both as I think both are relevant to figuring out what I need to get done while in my awake time.
DeleteThanks for dropping in, Jeff - much appreciated. :) :)
I never read your post before about Courtney and how it was mainly your husbands idea at the time haha, that's such a funny story Jenny. I'm with you on children too, for me having a child is the moment you decide that you're putting your life to the bottom of the priorities pile and putting this child at the top and that's a good thing but a scary thing to me as well. Great post, really hope that Courtney had a great birthday, she is awesome!
ReplyDeleteYup, the old boy wanted to start a family but then shirked his responsibilities... and, Matt, I'm not a patient woman so I showed him the door which promptly had its locks changed. As I'm not one to wallow in pity I laced up my big girl shoes and met the challenges of single parenting face on - never looked back, never had regrets.
DeleteCourtney is the blessing from that relationship - one I would never have had had I not succumbed to his persistence on having a child. I agree, she is awesome!
And yes, I did put me and all my dreams on the bottom of the priority pile but now I'm dusting them off and seeing if I like how they fit - I've had some adjustments as my wants and needs have changed as the time has passed.
Thanks, Matt, for dropping in - as always I'm sending you hugs for your efforts. :) :)
My dream was just to own a house. Check!
ReplyDeleteNow I'm looking at property to build my own tiny little cabin.
Congrats on the VW. I hear they are great cars.
How much firewood and topsoil can that thing haul?
Hi Bushman - yes, that was a big one - the house! And in this overpriced part of the planet I really had to work like a dog! (a cute cuddly one, but a dog no less) :) :)
DeleteAs to your tiny little cabin - that's what I want too. This does look tiny in the photo, doesn't it?! ;)
My VW is my practical 4 door car - everyone should have a "practical" car - and once those back seats are flipped down I'm sure I could be doing a mighty fine job hauling firewood and topsoil to that tiny cabin of mine! Yes sir - make no mistake - I was thinking of that when I bought this little puppy. :)
These German cars are amazing - on the autobahn, at 225 km I want you to know nothing shakes, rattles or rolls - I was sold after that! :) :)
That's a beautiful cabin and view!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the new car.
The view is amazing, GE - truly amazing!
DeleteThanks for the congrats - I'm really enjoying my car... seems to have a built-in Homing device - it finds Hommes and their telescopes without any difficulty. haha :) :)
Thanks for dropping by!
Orthodontia- how I hate thee. I have told my daughter that we could have sent her to community college 2 years on the price we paid for her teeth. Quad helix, partial braces, retainers, full set of braces, and now retainers again. Thank God she will never get wisdom teeth. Got that from me.
ReplyDeleteWe had so many plans for vacations and fixing up our house and it just has never happened.
Such is life.
Don't get me started, Ruth - you and I could be living the life if it wasn't for those mouths that needed more than feeding. I didn't go into details in my post but you and I have the same child - separated at birth... hahaha
DeleteWell, good thing there's booze and my wicked sense of humour otherwise I'd've never made it this far. :) :)
Vacation? What's that? The vacation we had - every second year, was to Disneyland, in California, so sweet precious could commune with her gods! :) :)
Having spent the bulk of the past 21 years spending, I can only now see the end in sight. Don't get me wrong, I cherish my children, but they are an expensive proposition. Soon enough they'll be "off the payroll" and then Mrs. Penwasser and I can look at doing some of the things we put to the side in the early 90s. Except we'll probably be too old to do them anymore.
ReplyDeleteBut, you know, I'd do it all over again!
This lifeboat is full Al, you'll have to wait for the next dingy... me and Ruth got first dibs - maybe you can share with Bushman! *cheeky grin*
DeleteIf only we could have gotten some work out of them when they were "on the payroll" it might have been worth the sacrifice.
But, seriously, you're right... we'd do it all over again. Why, because we just don't learn from our mistakes... do we! :P :P
Hi Jenny .. I bet kids cost - and though I don't have any .. dreams are still on hold - but that's life .. at least they're still there.
ReplyDeleteGreat das Auto .. and so pleased you're enjoying it - then the house make over .. that will make summer seem like bliss ... cheers Hilary
Yes, kids cost - but as Al says - we'd do it all over again - so they must be worth it!
DeleteI am enjoying my car, Hilary - thank you! As to the house, I've been clearing it out in preparation for the renovations - it will be major. I'm taking before pics and as it's being done I may do a few posts about the process.
I can't wait to have my first post-reno party - would you like an invite!! I'd love to have you!
With smiles and hugs, Jenny